04 March 2005
Epiphany
The mound of pillows engulfed the infant, always fearful of the wispy fingers of darkness, full of ghosts and historical remnants echoing in the sleeping household. She curled her blanket around her toes, protecting them from the intrusive dark air. She clutched her safety pillow between her legs and began struggling for breath beneath the tightly wrapped blanket, unable to sleep, but unable to uncover her face and dig her way from the tunnel her bed had become.
Even at the age of two, the child rationalised with herself, trying to convince herself that she would be safe as long as she remained under the sheets, convincing herself that as long as she was unable to see beyond her self-imposed wall of censorship, there could be nothing beyond that wall. She wanted desperately to understand the abnormalities occurring in the darkness surrounding her in the night, yet, was scared of anything she couldn't immediately fathom.
Her mind wandered for a moment, imagining in gruesome detail the flailing flight through the darkness that she would have in a desperate search for her mother and father should the sheets be torn from her clinging body. She wondered who she would find first, what language she would have to shout for help in - Finnish for her father, Thai for her mother. In the darkness, how would she know who was still tossing in half-sleep to hear her cries?
The phobias became claustrophobic in the darkness as they all jostled about, screaming to be heard, and the silence of the dark room was more than she could stand.
Her mother and father lay reading in bed, their night lamps casting a warm glow in the tranquillity of the bedroom. Her father turned a page of his newspaper and it rustled gently against the rainbow pattern on his white sheets. He thought, "Maybe she won't come running here in tears again tonight."
A little figure had entered the room silently, and stood grinning at finding both parents still awake, as though waiting for her arrival. She had found a bridge between two cultures, and uncovered the most closely guarded secret between her parents. "Hello." she said, "I speak English now".
fon @ 1:56 am link to post * *